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Why I am careful to use the word ‘breakthrough’

In my late twenties, I had been on a years-long headlong dive into personal growth and transformation.

I had started my private practice. I was making more money than I had as a dancer (and often waitress). I was on my way to healing body dysmorphia and my disordered relationship with food.

But I had also identified some persistent, painful, repeating patterns that seemed to stay with me, despite the workshops I did, habits I changed, and modalities I explored.

I remember a bleak moment, looking out the window from my one-bedroom apartment in New York City, playing out the rest of my life with those patterns running me.

I didn’t want to
live the rest of my life that way.
Or, to be honest,
live it at all.

Fast forward about six years, I remember a vastly different moment, having recently completed a two-year training in Transformational NLP that allowed me to expand my skills as a really good coach to an extraordinary one.

I was looking out the window of my home office in San Francisco, the most hopeful feeling spreading from my heart to my whole body, as I realized that I could change nearly ANYTHING about my life, including those same lifelong patterns that had been so persistently with me.

In fact, many of them I HAD changed.
And I was seeing similar kinds of changes with my clients as well.

The way I saw myself, treated myself, 
what I knew was possible 
for myself and my life, 
was so different, 
after even a single session.

A good word to describe this is ‘breakthrough.’

Coming to the session with something so intractable and painful and then leaving the session, and in the weeks after as it integrated, with a sense of myself as whole and capable, enlivened, and clear — the word ‘breakthrough’ does encapsulate that liberating experience.

Which is why I like the word.

But here’s why I don’t like 
the word ‘breakthrough.’

Because breakthrough is often code for make-over. Once broken, now fixed. Unrecognizable. A whole new you.
But a make-over only lasts until the make-up inevitably washes away.
I also don’t like the way that, in a breakthrough, you’re supposed to ‘break’ something. Crush the pattern. Bust through the belief. Kill your ego. Fight that weak part of you and win.
What I’m interested in — and have been facilitating for the last two decades — is remarkable change that lasts and in fact deepens, over weeks and months and years.

Change that actually has 
you like and respect yourself more 
rather than feeling 
there’s anything within you 
that you must break.

Over the last twenty years, women come to me with the toughest, most intractable questions in life. 
And, whether it’s in multi-month courses or coaching programs, or a single session, we create incredible breakthroughs in record time.

The lasting, liberating 
kind of breakthroughs, 
of course.

If you are curious about this kind of breakthrough session together, you can learn more and get the ball rolling here.

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